Saturday 9 : Nobody Knows You When You're Down & Out

1. When did you last feel down and out?  About two years until present. I'm still stuck in a relationship that's been draining me of everything. I thank my friends around me that's been keeping me sane.
2. What do you do to feel sexy? Dance! In any form and style. I love dancing though I don't qualify as a dancer. I can do some moves here and there, but that's it. When I memorize a dance routine I feel very sexy and fit.
3. Do you think people think you are normal?  I guess so. I have friends and colleagues that seek my advice. But if they only knew what I've been thinking when I'm alone, they might think twice before coming near me.
4. What have you always wanted to do?  To be pre-school teacher. It's my dream to teach and influence in a positive way a child in his/her early stage in life. It gives them a great outlook in life. I wanna be the one that will do that to them.
5. What do you appreciate the most about your life at this time? My daughter. Inspite of what is happening between me and my husband, I am really thankful that I have a very understanding, thoughtful, kind-hearted, smart and very pretty daughter. 
6. If you could be somewhere else, where would you be and why?  Exploring Asia and Europe. I love to travel but can't do much of it since I am out of budget.
7. Have you ever made a fool of yourself? If yes, spill.  Yes, because I fell in love. That's it.
8. How often do you feel guilty? Almost never. I always apologize if I knew I did something wrong to a person. And if I don't apologize when other people think I should, it's their problem.
9. Give us an example of what you've done when feeling low self-esteem.  Well, whenever I feel down I watch a movie. My daughter and I have a specific movie to watch when we are not feeling 'it'. It's Mulan. We call it our feel-good-movie.  

If you want to join this weekend, please click here. 

friday fill-ins

This is my first time to join Friday Fill-Ins, so welcome to me! And this is a late post. It's Saturday here in my country but nevertheless, I'm still joining this week. If you would like to participate click here for the link.

So, here goes...

1. The tale is told of a princess meeting his prince that turns into a frog.
2. The freckles on my skin is something that always makes me think of my ancestors.
3. To ensure solace, pray.
4. Crying is a fine thing.
5. It's never too late to fall in love again.
6. My estranged husband and I used to exchange notes on the back of an old receipt.
7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to going to church at Quaipo, tomorrow my plans include going to my dermatologist and Sunday, I want to jog at Luneta!

friday quotes: loving life and loving yourself

wednesday happy thoughts

happiness is....

1. leslie's smiles...inspite of our family's current predicament
2. aily's giggles...she's growing so fast!
3. blog hopping
4. mixpod
5. sleeping at my parent's
6. be careful with my heart
7. tukneneng and singkamas
8. my gorgeous friends
9. being busy at the office
10. zumba

to know how this started and for credits on the image, click here.

music monday #008 - psy

Dougie is out....Gangnam is in!!!. The latest YouTube sensation from Korea is Psy and his hit single Oppa Gangnam Style. The song is very catchy and lively to dance with. It is healthy to be crazy once in a while. And the best place to be crazy is on the dance floor. So everybody, let's dance...

   

Hello Fall $1000 Give Away

I am joining Hello Fall $1000 Give Away hosted by Happy Home and Family and Jenns Blah Blah Blog. I hope to win for I intend to finish the construction of our house so that me and my daughter will live conveniently in our humble abode. Wish me luck!!!  

Saturday 9 : Papa Was a Rolling Stone

1. What's the best memory that you have of your dad, while growing up?  As a kid growing up, I saw my Papa as a hard-working and responsible provider to his five (5) children. But, nevertheless, this is not an excuse for him not to take the weekends as a special time for his family. He makes sure that we are all togther doing things worthwhile every Sunday. He works from Monday to Saturday. But every Saturday night he brought us goodies that we can all share the whole night. My favorite is a gallon of ice cream. Then the following day we attend church. After that it's either a stroll at the park or a fun day at the movie house. Followed by an enjoyable bite time at the restaurant of our choice
2. How boring do you think your life is?  I don't have a boring life, just a simple one. Being a mother to a fabulous daughter takes away all the dull moments. And also as a sales person, my hours are always full. Plus i have loads of friends who love to go out.
3. Can you do any accents? If not, do you know someone who is good at it?  I don't, but my daughter is very fluent in English and she can do british and American accents. She is currently practicing Australian accent too.
4. What technology did you at first fear that you now could not live without?  Cellphone, nothing else.
5. Do you, or have you ever, thought you have a book in you?  I tried, during my college days, to write a book. I never finish anything I started. I guess writing is not my calling. But I am a bookish though. I never went anywhere without a book. I will read anything.
6. How does the weather affect where you live?  Very much!!! Being in a tropical country, where we have half a year of rainy season, and floods are a common sight in the Philippines. But recently, everything become worse. Putting not just our properties in danger, but our lives as  well.
7. Are you more interested in your favorite artist's next work, or the TMZ side of it all?  I hate 'tsismis'. That is the term we use when you criticize or make a negative publicity about a certain artist. I judge an artist based on his work, and nothing else.
8. Have you ever felt "battle-scarred" by a relationship or relationships in general? If yes, do tell.  As of this writing I am still in a relationship that is killing me softly. I am more than hurt, I am dying. I am married and we don't have divorce here in the Philippines. That is why, eventhough, my husband is the most stubborn, egocentric and the most irritable person I know, I have to endure everything. I thought I met a frog that will turn into a prince when I kiss him. Instead, I kissed a frog that turns into a monster.
9. Do you tend to root for the bad guy?  Never. I opt for a Tom Hansen (500 days of Summer) type of guy.   

If you want to join this weekend here is the link. Have fun

firday quotes: how to make a beautiful life

whoa!..fifty shades got real

this is what greets me this morning....

Italian woman sues husband for seven years of ‘slavery’ after signing Fifty Shades of Grey-style submissive contract

An unnamed Italian woman is suing her husband after spending seven years living under a Fifty Shades of Grey-style sexual contract.

The saleswoman from Padua was 24 when she signed a bizarre contract promising total sexual and mental submission to her ‘padrone’ and husband, who is ten years her senior.
The two page contract stipulated that, "The slave agrees to obey and to offer herself for the satisfaction of the desires of her master. The slave agrees to place her body at her master's disposition, to be used at his pleasure."
The husband agreed that he would not subject his wife to "coprophilia, bestiality, asphyxia/restriction of breathing, branding by fire, any activities involving weapons and any acts in general which could permanently mark her physically".
After their relationship broke down, the woman has been able to use their sexual contract as evidence of physical and emotional abuse during the marriage. The husband, now aged 41, argues that she signed the pact entirely of her own free will and that the activities were always consensual.
It is now up to a prosecutor, Sergio Dini, to decide whether the wife can reasonably claim physical abuse, or whether her accusations should be dismissed on the basis that she signed a contract detailing her husband's extreme tastes in the bedroom.
The case mimics the plot of Fifty Shades of Grey where Ana Steele and Christian Grey get involved in a sadomasochistic relationship.
What do you think?

Source: yahoo! news

wednesday happy thoughts dilemma

since i started my blog, i've been joing a meme hosted by mich which is the 'wednesday happy thoughts'. this is a terrific way to express how we find happiness in the smallest of things. this is also a reminder of how truly blessed we all are in different ways. in the case of a very depressing situation, one can always look back to his/her blog post and be reminded of how good life is.

that's my dilemma. see, i have to post ten (10) things that means happiness to me for the past week. i tried to make a list this morning, but after my lunch break i notice that i cannot fill up my list. i can write one or two things and then i can't think of no other things to add. am i that dismal?

well, the answer is a resounding YES!!! i cannot divulge on the details, i might infect you with my dreary feelings. but i guess for now, i will make a pass on posting an entry for this meme this week. but with high hopes, i might find ten things by next week.

music monday #007 - florence and the machine

Regrets collect like old friends
Here to relive your darkest moments
I can see no way, I can see no way
And all of the ghouls come out to play
And every demon wants his pound of flesh
But I like to keep some things to myself
I like to keep my issues drawn
It's always darkest before the dawn

And I've been a fool and I've been blind
I can never leave the past behind
I can see no way, I can see no way
I'm always dragging that horse around
And our love is pastured such a mournful sound
Tonight I'm gonna bury that horse in the ground
So I like to keep my issues drawn
But it's always darkest before the dawn

Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah
Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaaah
And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off, oh woah

I am done with my graceless heart
So tonight I'm gonna cut it out and then restart
Cause I like to keep my issues drawn
It's always darkest before the dawn

Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah
Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah
And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off, oh woah
And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back so shake him off

And given half the chance would I take any of it back
It's a fine romance but its left me so undone
It's always darkest before the dawn

Oh woah, oh woah...

And I'm damned if I do and I'm damned if I don't
So here's to drinks in the dark at the end of my road
And I'm ready to suffer and I'm ready to hope
It's a shot in the dark and right at my throat
Cause looking for heaven, found the devil in me
Looking for heaven, found the devil in me
Well what the hell I'm gonna let it happen to me

Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah
Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah
And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off, oh woah

Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah
Shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, shake it out, ooh woaaah
And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back
So shake him off, oh woah

friday quotes : seven dangers to human virtue

wednesday happy thoughts

happiness is....

1. 36, and still pretty
2. facebook...for telling everybody that it's my birthday
3. my super bait boss
4. my daughter showering me with kisses and iloveyou's on my special day
5. friends and family
6. be careful with my heart
7. helping a friend in need
8. twitter, 9gag, tumblr, etc...for the distraction
9. my playlist
10. zumba

to know how this started and for credits on the image, click here.

be careful with my heart

i've been introduced to teleseryes during my elementary days. mara clara was an everyday activity for me. as i grow older and became busy, i watch less and less of these teleseryes. however, because of iwanttv.com, i can watch my kapamilya programs anywhere, anytime i want. naks! parang commercial lang ah.

well, here at the office, we have an ongoing craze over a certain program of abs-cbn. every lunchtime we watched it through iwanttv. it's the teleserye Be Careful with My Heart, which stars jodi sta. maria and richard yap. it's a story about a probinsyana who struggles all her life for her family. driven with her positive attitude in life she make ends meet in anyway possible and pursue her dream of becoming a flight stewardess. she met a rich and handsome widower that offers her a job as a yaya to his youngest child. in spite of her 'Sir Chief' being surly, she fell in love with him and his kids. and so the story continues. 

we love this show so much because it is very light to the heart. unlike other teleserye that revolves around families deceiving each other, involving into crimes, illicit affairs, and other conundrums. sobrang bigat sa dibdib. but this show never failed to give us smiles. as one of my officemate relates..." ate, sana may movie din". one can only hope, right?

happy birthday to me

another year older, another year wiser...

every time i woke up on the morning of my birthday this is what i tell myself. i'm 36 today. definitely older but not wiser. i had my share of ups and downs in life. i have an almost perfect family who loves me dearly. i'm good at school and got a fairly good amount of friends. i have a happy childhood, so to speak, in spite of my parents (grandparents, uncles and aunts) being strict. i love my siblings. we are all crazy when we are together.

and then i fell in love (ha ha ha). my then boyfriend and i elope during college. to make the long story short, we got married young, under graduate and both jobless. with a kid coming. thus, the downs of my life begins.

don't get me wrong, being a mother is the most rewarding job in the world. i love my daughter so much. she means everything to me. but i cannot say the same thing to as being a wife. we hurriedly tied the knot without fully knowing each other, thinking that being in love is enough. we are wrong, so wrong. we grew apart, putting it simply. until recently i came to realize that our relationship is irreparable. no amount of apologies can take away the pain we inflict on each other. clearly, we are nearing the end.

i know how sad that sounded but my husband is not the reason of my being melodramatic on the night of my birthday. it's the missed opportunities in life. the things that i want to do but never had a chance to do so. the timing doesn't permit. the schedule doesn't allow. and the budget is so scarce. i have my priorities now. that is the downside of being an adult. you cannot only think of your self. 

a friend ask me time and again when will i have a life. and i was thinking, isn't this the life i'm living? if it is, i wanna die. seriously, i am not really 'complaining'. but lately, i find it hard to even give a genuine smile. i had to be okay so that everyone around me will be okay. i am not a luxurious person. a simple plate of cake can make my day.  but this past few months i am always on the verge of crying. and it's embarrassing even for  a dramatic queen like me. 

well, the truth is, i don't know what is wrong. i don't know what i want. i don't know how to find my sunshine. i really don't know what to do. serendipity is a strange word for me, not in my dictionary. i guess i am still on a pursuit. 

anyways, my wish on my birthday is that i hope to find my sunshine soon. i cannot function fully if i'm not inspired. so far, music is my refuge. an escape to my ordinary world. guess, i'll need to put my headset on now and be somewhere else...goodnight!

friday quotes : gift

                   it's my birthday soon, and i was hoping.....

wednesday happy thoughts

happiness is....

1. strawberry jelly
2. viber
3. company outing (after 3 years) at marinduque
4. basking in the sun by the beach of marinduque at the height of typhoon Igme
5. my swimsuit fits (somehow) ha ha ha
6. weekend movietime with leslie
7. my super cute niece who is not a cry baby anymore
8. mirko's improving reading skills
9. being back to my zumba schedule
10. hot green tea and its calming effect on me

to know how this started and for credits on the image, click here.